I want to thank you for your support. I got my ducks in a row today and am back on track.
I appreciate the care I have received from you all. It really helped me redirect my thoughts to what is important and that I am not going crazy and that these feelings are normal. All is well.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Daddy's feelings are hurt
Madison has been really whiny lately and only seems to want Mommy. While on one hand it is flattering to be the center of a person's world, it makes the simple things, like showering and going to the bathroom quite difficult. I have to sneak in the house after work and go and change my clothes before going in the living room and saying Hello or she goes into a living fit when I try and change my clothes after saying Hello.
Madison has also started to "give loves" and she grabs you by the neck (in my case by the hair) and pulls in close and open mouth kisses you (in my case sucks my chin) (Hey you call it sucking chin, I call it love!) She does it sometimes without warning and sometimes on cue when you ask for it. It is the cutest thing every. She does it to Papa, G'ma and Mommy. Problem is..Daddy has yet to receive any. Now don't get me wrong, Maddie's Daddy is very loving and is a fully participant parent. He also has 2 hours a day with her after G'ma's house and before Mommy gets home to spend quality time with her. He is also the one who can soothe her to sleep late at night when she wants nothing to do with Mommy. He starts singing to her and it is the sweetest thing on earth.
Well yesterday was the last straw for Daddy. Daddy was trying to give Mommy a "break" so she could do dishes (What kind of crap is that?) anyway....Madison twisted and turned away from him crying reaching out her arms to me in desparation. It was so sad. More sad was the look on Daddy's face. He was so butt hurt it wasn't funny.
Daddy was so hurt. No loves, and she only wants Mommy. I didn't know what to tell him to make him feel better. I wanted to reassure him this was normal (what the hell do I know about normal baby stuff) I made it up...I just told him, she knows what she wants and right now she wants Mommy and next time she'll want Daddy.
I can't believe it has been 7 months! Thanks Tawny for the B-day Shout out! What a ride, what a wonderful miraculous ride.
Madison has also started to "give loves" and she grabs you by the neck (in my case by the hair) and pulls in close and open mouth kisses you (in my case sucks my chin) (Hey you call it sucking chin, I call it love!) She does it sometimes without warning and sometimes on cue when you ask for it. It is the cutest thing every. She does it to Papa, G'ma and Mommy. Problem is..Daddy has yet to receive any. Now don't get me wrong, Maddie's Daddy is very loving and is a fully participant parent. He also has 2 hours a day with her after G'ma's house and before Mommy gets home to spend quality time with her. He is also the one who can soothe her to sleep late at night when she wants nothing to do with Mommy. He starts singing to her and it is the sweetest thing on earth.
Well yesterday was the last straw for Daddy. Daddy was trying to give Mommy a "break" so she could do dishes (What kind of crap is that?) anyway....Madison twisted and turned away from him crying reaching out her arms to me in desparation. It was so sad. More sad was the look on Daddy's face. He was so butt hurt it wasn't funny.
Daddy was so hurt. No loves, and she only wants Mommy. I didn't know what to tell him to make him feel better. I wanted to reassure him this was normal (what the hell do I know about normal baby stuff) I made it up...I just told him, she knows what she wants and right now she wants Mommy and next time she'll want Daddy.
I can't believe it has been 7 months! Thanks Tawny for the B-day Shout out! What a ride, what a wonderful miraculous ride.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Almost 10 HOURS!
Madison DID IT! She SLEPT THE WHOLE NIGHT last night! She went down at 9:30 and I finally couldn't stand it anymore and went in to get her at 6:50. She was not sleeping but not crying and like all mornings, greeted me with the biggest of smiles and coos. This is a big event for us. It was over three months ago that she slept through the night (8pm to 5am) and I had to write it down!
What I have learned about myself:
I never thought I would be so interested in someone else's poop: color, consistency, regularily, etc. Note to self: Not everyone gives a poop about Madison's poop!
What I have learned about myself:
I never thought I would be so interested in someone else's poop: color, consistency, regularily, etc. Note to self: Not everyone gives a poop about Madison's poop!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Happy First Mother's Day ZZZZzzzzz
Sunday was my 1st Mother's Day as a new Mom and what a wonderful day it was. I spent a wonderful quiet morning with Rick opening up cards from him, Madison and both dogs (My 1 year old Schnauzer Roxy actually brought her card in to the room for me in her mouth and my 9 year old Zoe signed hers with a muddy paw print.) Then Rick was off to LA for training for a week so Madison and I enjoyed getting ready to go to Grandma's. We had a wonderful day playing dominoes and Pitch and Mom and I traded off playing with Madison. It was a nice relaxing unstressful day as all of our holidays in my family are.
Madison gave me the best present any new Mom could ever dream of receiving....She has settled in to a new sleep routine and for the last five nights in a row she has only gotten up...drum roll please...ONE time each night. This is an amazing turn of events for us (by us, let me clarify, I mean Madison and I, Rick has no clue) and could not have come at a better time. For months now I have been getting up every 2 to 3 hours to breastfeed and lull her back to sleep. She doesn't yell or scream to get me up, just enough noise that I hear her and I quietly go in and she sucks a bit and then goes right back to sleep and then luckily so do I. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I have actually said outloud in the night "Are you kidding me?". The dogs think I am crazy.
I thought I was doing okay with this whole sleep deprivation and then I got sick and it really kicked my butt. I began questioning my mothering instinct about not letting her 'cry it out' and told myself that she nurses so much at night because she misses me during the day while I am work. But then I worried I was not teaching her how to 'self soothe' and that I was a bad Mom. My theory is that she sensed what I needed and has provided it to me, some Z's. Funny how four hours of sleep in a row is so much more refreshing than it ever could have been prebaby. I know that it is short term because teething hasn't started but I am enjoying it while I can. What have I learned?If your baby lets you sleep long enough, your boobs will wake you up! (can I say "boobs"?)
Madison gave me the best present any new Mom could ever dream of receiving....She has settled in to a new sleep routine and for the last five nights in a row she has only gotten up...drum roll please...ONE time each night. This is an amazing turn of events for us (by us, let me clarify, I mean Madison and I, Rick has no clue) and could not have come at a better time. For months now I have been getting up every 2 to 3 hours to breastfeed and lull her back to sleep. She doesn't yell or scream to get me up, just enough noise that I hear her and I quietly go in and she sucks a bit and then goes right back to sleep and then luckily so do I. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I have actually said outloud in the night "Are you kidding me?". The dogs think I am crazy.
I thought I was doing okay with this whole sleep deprivation and then I got sick and it really kicked my butt. I began questioning my mothering instinct about not letting her 'cry it out' and told myself that she nurses so much at night because she misses me during the day while I am work. But then I worried I was not teaching her how to 'self soothe' and that I was a bad Mom. My theory is that she sensed what I needed and has provided it to me, some Z's. Funny how four hours of sleep in a row is so much more refreshing than it ever could have been prebaby. I know that it is short term because teething hasn't started but I am enjoying it while I can. What have I learned?If your baby lets you sleep long enough, your boobs will wake you up! (can I say "boobs"?)
Monday, May 12, 2008
By Popular Demand
Well, by Tawny Demand really! My very first blog post...let's see where do I begin? First I want to thank Tawny for designing my blog as I didn't know where to start. I am sure as things get going it will be easier. I keep mental notes about "don't forget to write it down in the baby book", I hope this makes things easier for me to jot things down I don't want to forget. People keep telling me, "treasure it while it lasts, they aren't babies for long" It is making me crazy sometimes, I am in a panic I am going to miss a moment or forget a smile or something she did that was cute. I am taking hundreds of pictures so I don't miss anything. I think sometimes I am so worried about missing something that I miss stuff. You know when you are the photographer at an event that you miss most of what happens at the event and then you aren't in any of the photos like you weren't even there!? That is how I feel sometimes.
I am not sure how I am going to organize my thoughts on here so forgive me if at first they seem scattered, for those of you who know me, it won't come as much surprise anyway!
I had to get something out there and started though. So here it is, the first one is out of the way and on to the next....stay tuned.
I am not sure how I am going to organize my thoughts on here so forgive me if at first they seem scattered, for those of you who know me, it won't come as much surprise anyway!
I had to get something out there and started though. So here it is, the first one is out of the way and on to the next....stay tuned.
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